When you’re feeling especially low, you may ask yourself, “Why do I feel like a failure?” We’ve all been there.
Let me guide you through some of the best ways to cope with these terrible feelings. Read on and understand how you can improve your life.
What Is The Failure Lifetrap?
The failure lifetrap is a harmful pattern of thinking and behavior that can make you feel like a failure in various aspects of your life.
This lifetrap can stem from childhood experiences, negative self-perceptions, or unrealistic expectations placed upon yourself.
When you fall into the failure lifetrap, you may constantly berate yourself for not meeting high standards or compare yourself unfavorably to others.
Common Feelings When You Think You’ve Failed
There are several common things and behaviors that a person exhibits when they feel like a failure.
It’s not unusual to feel really down or anxious when you believe you haven’t succeeded. These emotions can be heavy.
You might also feel embarrassed or view yourself as less capable compared to others.
During these times, you could notice that your confidence takes a hit. Questions about your abilities might pop up in your mind, and you may start to doubt your skills.
Another feeling that might arise is frustration. You’ve put in the effort, and things didn’t pan out as you hoped. This can lead to negative thoughts and feelings of anger or irritation, mostly directed at yourself.
Feeling lonely or isolated is also common when you’re dealing with a sense of failure. You might think that you’re the only one struggling, while everyone else seems to be doing just fine.
Why You Might Feel Like a Failure
There are several reasons why feelings of failure might be cropping up in your head and causing emotional distress.
Comparing Yourself to Others
At times, you might get the sense that you’re not succeeding because you’re looking at other people’s lives, particularly on platforms like Instagram or Facebook.
These places can be tricky because they often show only the happiest moments, making it seem like everyone else has things figured out. Remember, what you’re seeing is just a highlight reel, not the full story.
Goals Set Too High
Another reason you might feel down is if you’ve set a really ambitious goal for yourself. It’s fantastic to aim high, but sometimes we reach for the stars and end up a little short.
This doesn’t mean you’ve failed; it means you’re pushing your limits and learning. Every step, even the small ones, is progress.
Aiming For Perfection
Often, we can be our own harshest critics. You might think that anything less than perfect is a letdown.
This kind of all-or-nothing thinking can be really limiting. Life isn’t about being perfect. It’s about growth, making mistakes, and getting better bit by bit.
Cut yourself some slack and recognize the value in the journey, not just the destination.
How Feeling Like a Failure Affects You
Feelings of failure can have a big impact on what you do every day. When you’re weighed down by these feelings, you might lose the courage to try new things or to keep working towards your dreams.
These negative feelings can make you want to stay away from others. You may miss out on fun times with your friends or warm moments with your family because this feeling tells you to be alone.
Feeling like a failure can actually make you feel physically sick. It can cause your body to react in ways that are not fun. You might get headaches, feel tired all the time, or even get a stomachache.
How To Stop Feeling Like A Failure In Life
Overcoming feelings of failure can be tough, but with the right approach you can do it. Here are some things you can do that are key to overcoming feelings of inadequacy.
Changing the Story in Your Head
The things we tell ourselves can really shape how we feel. When things don’t go as planned, that voice in our heads might start saying unkind things.
You have the power to change that story. Instead of being hard on yourself, try to see every setback as a stepping stone to doing better next time.
If you keep thinking that you’re a failure, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Change your mindset, and that will change your destiny.
Learning From Failure
When things don’t go according to plan, it’s not a signal to stop trying. Instead, it’s a chance to grow and improve.
Everyone makes mistakes from time to time. One setback doesn’t make you a failure. Don’t be afraid to try again. The most successful people in the world have one thing in common: they didn’t give up, even when things were tough.
Keep pushing forward, and you’ll be amazed at what you can achieve.
Practicing Gratitude
Gratitude is when we notice and appreciate the good things in our lives. There is always something to be thankful for.
It could be your family who always supports you, or your friends who make you laugh. Maybe it’s your pet who greets you with excitement every day.
Being thankful helps us remember that even when we face challenges, there’s still plenty of good in our lives. This can make the tough stuff seem smaller and less overwhelming.
Gratitude in Action
So, how do you practice gratitude? You can start by thinking of three things you’re thankful for every day.
Start a gratitude journal and jot these things down. Doing this regularly can train your brain to be more positive and can make a big difference in how you feel.
Setting Goals That Make Sense
Make your goals specific and attainable. If they are set too high, you might get discouraged because they feel impossible to reach. If they’re too low, they won’t challenge you, and you won’t grow.
Set your goals for a time that makes sense. If you have a big project, break it down into smaller tasks and spread them out over weeks or even months. This gives you enough time to do a good job and to handle any surprises that might come up.
Getting Help From Friends and Family
It’s completely normal to seek support when life gets tough. The people who know you best can offer a fresh perspective that can shine a light on a solution you hadn’t thought of.
Communication is key, and by sharing your thoughts and feelings, you create an opportunity for understanding and empathy. You are allowing those who care about you to lend an ear and offer advice.
Everyone has moments of self-doubt and feeling overwhelmed—it’s part of being human. By reaching out, you’re taking a positive step towards feeling better.
Seek Professional Help (In-Person or Online Therapy)
If you don’t feel comfortable speaking to friends or family, or if your feelings are getting overwhelming, it’s best to speak to a professional.
Talking to a therapist can help you identify the root causes behind your fear of failure.
Show Self-Compassion
When you make a mistake or things don’t go as planned, remember that it’s okay. Remind yourself that everyone has tough days and that you are doing your best.
It can be easy to blame yourself, but remind yourself about your strengths and achievements.
Embrace New Experiences
Life is full of new experiences, and each one is an opportunity to learn something valuable. Whether it’s trying a new sport, learning to play an instrument, or tackling a difficult subject at school, dive in with enthusiasm.
Yes, you might stumble at first, but that’s just part of the process. With each attempt, you’ll find you’re getting better and better.
Reflect on Your Progress
Take a moment from time to time to look back at how far you’ve come. Seeing your own progress is incredibly motivating and a powerful reminder that you are capable of great things.
Wrapping It Up
I know it sounds a bit cliched at this point, but everyone makes mistakes. They are a part of life. Some things don’t go the way you planned them to.
By taking steps to overcome your feelings of failure, you can work toward a more fulfilling life.